My Snuggie and Me

Hello All! I trust that everyone had a lovely Christmas. I certainly did.

My family's Christmas has always been more of a celebration of Jesus' birth, than a present exchange; so I never expect to get a gift at Christmas. It's still a great time of year because I get to be with family, eat great food and watch a lot of television. Well this year, I woke up and was calling around wishing people a Merry Christmas, and during a phone call break, my mom asked if I saw what she put in my room. "No", I replied. All the while wondering why she would have gotten me something and what it could have possibly been. I entered my room cautiously, still not fully comprehending what was going on. I'd been jobless for 4 months now and pretty dependent on my parents for survival. That was present enough in my mind. I opened the bag and immediately started to giggle when I pulled out the box inside. My giggle soon turned to a full blown laugh. "A Snuggie", I yelled from my room. I grabbed the box and ran into the kitchen. "You got me a Snuggie!" My mom explained that she had been out shopping and saw them on sale and felt moved to get me one.

Needless to say, my Christmas consisted of me laying on the couch, engulfed by the warmth my new best friend, the blue Snuggie, provided me. I happily enjoyed the luxuries of channel changing, texting and drinking all while still "under" my blanket. "Brilliant", I thought as I texted close friends to boast about my new Snuggie. I looked and felt like a Jedi Knight.

One friend responded, "How will you ever get a job, now that you have a Snuggie?" A legitimate question indeed. Obviously, I've left the couch since receiving the Snuggie, but it was hard. It will certainly be harder to go to work all day! I'm reminded of an episode from 30 Rock, where Tina Fey's character is sitting at her desk in her Snuggie. It makes so much sense now! And to all you skeptics who have said things like, "Isn't it just a robe?" Or "I heard that it was just an over-sized blanket." I'll have you know that my Snuggie is neither a robe nor an over-sized blanket. It is a gift from God!!

My wise friend Gwyn once told me that someone's lack of understanding in a particular situation is just because it is something that they haven't experienced yet. So for all of you nay sayers, you just haven't experienced the Snuggie yet. Ah....the Snuggie.

Merry Christmas!!!!!

I started to write, and it was getting entirely too political for my taste. So, I deleted everything and decided to just keep it breezy.

My hope is that everyone finds themselves as blessed as me this holiday season. Hopefully you are sharing Christmas with family and/or friends. Eat, drink and be merry. And may God bless us, every one.

Merry Christmas y'all.

Ricky Gervais

I was watching 60 Minutes on Sunday, and they did an interview with Ricky Gervais. Now, if you're anything like me, then that name does not ring a bell. But, after seeing him, I immediately knew who he was.

I haven't always been the biggest fan of British comedy, but every now and again, a few shows will strike my fancy. Who's Line is it Anyway, Absolutely Fabulous and The Office. Well come to find out, Ricky Gervais not only starred in the British version of The Office, he wrote the bloody thing! Mind blowing! So, here I was, completely enthralled in the interview and everything he said made sense. Granted, these are things that I had been thinking, but it helps to have them validated by someone who actually experienced it.

He worked a serious of dead end office jobs that he hated, and one day, his friend asked him to help write a tv show about an office setting. Low and behold, the show gets picked up, not only in Britain, but in a ton of countries, and, AND, he gets paid for all of them! He wrote the show at 40, and is now 48 years old and completely baffled by how his life has turned out.

In listening to this interview, I started to think about the things that I've experienced and the experiences that are yet to come. God willing, I won't have to wait another 10 years to have my show picked up. But everyday that I'm not acting, is another day where I have an experience to add to a script. At one point, Ricky Gervais said he asked his girlfriend why he didn't think to do all of this sooner. She responded, "Because it wouldn't have worked." Simply put. He wouldn't have been able to create that show without the 20 years of office experience. Seeing that interview reminded me to stay encouraged. God has a plan for me and it's playing out.

Seriously?

Hello Everyone! I know that I've been gone for a while. All I can say is that I started working on another project, downloaded a virus onto the computer and have been gallivanting around Cali. I'm currently at my aunt's house in the Bay Area and enjoy daily walks on the beach. But there is something that has been on my mind and I feel that I must blog about it.

I like to watch the BBC news because I feel that it is less contaminated than the commercialized news we get. However, yesterday as I was happily learning about wordly matters, the BBC did something that disgusted me. They began to report on the Tiger Woods incident. Really? BBC? But why? And they were saying the same things that the other stupid channels were saying. "He still hasn't said why he was in the car." "He is only being fined $164." "By not commenting, he is only fueling the fire."

Who are these people? Why does it matter? How does anyone think that they have a right to know what happened? We are not entitled to anything, and I'm glad that he's keeping his mouth shut. And, to top it all off, I was so upset that I decided to watch the news in Spanish...yeah, you know where this is going! To make a long story short, I ended up turning off the tv. The Spanish news! Seriously!

Tiger Woods is human just like the rest of us, and at any given moment, we could lose control of our car and back into a tree. He didn't have any alcohol in his system and his wife was by his side when he was hurt. What more do these people need. Whatever happened is between him and his wife. I'm just so heated right now.

Little Falcon Heene and the Hot Air Balloon

Yes, I know I'm late on this one, but my uncle sent me the comic strip this morning and it reminded me of how I felt last week.  When the story first came on the radio, I immediately thought, "That kid isn't even in the balloon.  He's somewhere else."  I thought this because of the movie 12 monkeys, and the kid was supposed to have fallen into a well, but he was really hiding in the barn.  Movies and television have made me skeptical.  I'm great at solving the case, but occasionally, my judgement gets cloudy.

The more the story played, the more I decided that really, this poor 6 year old kid had plummeted to his death.  I was so sad for him!  I couldn't imagine this poor little guy, all alone in some make shift contraption and just scared and missing his parents.  This story really started to pull at my heart strings and I said a prayer that the object that fell from the balloon wasn't him.  I mean, I was a woman invested in the safe return of this kid.  So then why did his safe return seem cheapened?  I'll tell you why.  Because you can't tell people that a kid climbed into a balloon, flew away, the balloon was recovered with no kid in it, and then all of a sudden recall that something fell from the balloon.  Thursday afternoon was emotionally draining!  And then, after all of this, after all that we were put through, the kid turns out to be in an attic.  No.  Unacceptable.  The only acceptable way for this to turn out was that the search party found him, and yes, he had fallen, but had somehow magically bounced from tree branch to tree branch and then landed without a scratch on him.  That was how the story should have ended.

Do we know why the parents built a hot air balloon?  Was it because of the movie "Up"?  Did they want to go to Argentina?  I'm just so confused about all of it.  And why were they on "Wife Swap"?  Anyway.  We're all glad that little Falcon is home safe and we're all glad that he didn't have to experience the terrible journey that we all thought he was on.  Now Falcon, don't you pull a stunt like that again.  Next time I'll come to Colorado and spank you.

Edrei's Preschool Graduation Day

Yeah, you read right.  Edrei's Preschool Graduation Day.  Let me just go ahead and explain this one to you.  From time to time, I like to Google myself and see what pops up.  I've found that if I search "Edrei", that things about other people named Edrei will pop up.  If I search "Edrei Hutson", then my Facebook fan page is the first thing that comes up.  Well, I decided to start to search for me in other places.  Today, it just so happens that I was on youtube and saw an opportunity for an "Edrei" search.  Needless to say, the preschool graduation thing caught my eye immediately.  I don't quite remember what was running through my mind, but I'm sure that I knew it wasn't me.  

I clicked on the link and my suspicion that it was someone else was confirmed.  I will go ahead an encourage you to check out little Edrei's preschool graduation.  Actually, no, don't do that.  It's pretty boring.  

When I was on myspace, I would periodically do a search for my name, and it went from 4 pages to 7 pages to 11 pages.  I stopped looking after that because it became depressing.  Edrei's are coming out of the wood work!  There seem to be a lot of Asian and Hispanic people named Edrei.  It's all very interesting.  I was first confronted with this issue when I moved to Philly 4 years ago.  I went to the bank to open a bank account and the woman pronounced my name correctly.  I was surprised so I said, "Wow.  No one ever gets my name right."  What she said in response blew my mind, "Oh, well I have a friend named Edrei."  What!  Obviously it seems absurd that I would think that I was the only one...but you've all met me...I thought I was the only one!

I wonder if we have any of the same personality traits.  I like to think that having a unique name plays a huge roll in making me the person that I am today.  For instance, I am great with names.  I remember names and you better believe that I am going to pronounce it correctly.  My name is Edrei, not Ed or Eddie or some other variation.  Granted, once I know and love you, then you can give me whatever nick name you want.  But when I first meet someone, I don't want him/her asking me what else they can call me.  You can call me Edrei, just like everyone else.  Because of situations like that, I am very sensitive to names, and when I meet someone with a unique name, I make sure that I pronounce it correctly.  You'll be surprised at how many people will give you a nick name just because they are used to everyone butchering their real name.  Well not on my watch, new friend.  Your name is safe with me.

I think I got off on a rant somewhere.  Sorry about that!  Please do not let this discourage you from naming your children after me.  

Practicing Hypocrisy

I guess I should start by letting you know that I don't believe in motorcycles.  Not that I don't believe they exist, but that they are dangerous and people shouldn't ride them.  I didn't just make this decision out of impulse; it is well thought out.  When I was 22 or 23 I rode on the back of a Harley, and I'll admit, it was frightening at first but then it turned into great fun.  Regardless of all of that, it's still dangerous.  

I drove a conversion van, yeah, the van with the carpet on the walls, blinds and curtains on the windows, over sized reclining chairs and the bench that converts into a bed.  And while I would cruise around calmly in this over sized vehicle, I was immediately freaked out any time I saw a bike.  That's right, a bicycle, motorcycle, and I'm sure I would have been freaked out by a tricycle.  People who ride motorcycles always say that they are safe drivers and they'll be fine, and I'm sure that they are, but what about the people on the road who aren't and will accidentally hit you?  

So yesterday I was getting ready to run an errand with my cousin and he said, "Let's take the bike."  And I tried to fight it, but he was dead set on taking the bike out.  Luckily, this is one of those 3 wheeled motorcycles, a Can Am Spyder.  Yep, it looks just like the picture.  So I was sitting on the back of this bike and I was scared for my life!  My cousin was driving so fast!  I looked at the speedometer a few times, and no, we really weren't going fast, but when your only safety is you holding on to a couple of handles, then 60 miles an hour is way too fast.  There were a couple of times when I thought that I was going to die, but I just prayed and held on tight.  Everyone was staring at us.  People in cars were smiling and waving at us, I didn't wave back because I had to hold on for dear life.  Other bikers would pull up next to us and comment on the bike.  It really is a cool bike.  It gets up to 200 miles an hour, so I'm thankful that we didn't do that....

I decided that riding on the back of the bike reminded me of riding on the back of a jet ski.  That was super scary too, but driving the jet ski was the most fun.  So, I get it.  I get what the hype is about with motorcycles, I just think they are so dangerous and I am a hypocrite for getting on one.

Life Altering Events

Every now and again something will happen that takes your life to the next level.  Up until this point, my life has been heightened by what I like to consider "normal" things, such as travel, food, books, music, etc.  These normal things have helped to shape me and make me who I am today, and they are considered normal because I have access to them whenever I please.  

Well, this morning I was faced with an opportunity to heighten my life again.  I stood there staring at the shower in my cousin's room and knew that once I stepped in, there was no turning back.  Did I want to do this to myself?  Once you have experienced nice things, it's hard to go back to what you had before.  I can't go back to VHS now that I have DVDs.  I can't go back to Nintendo after having played a Playstation 3.  And now, now I have to go back to bad showers after having experienced the most amazing shower of my life.  

Every shower I've ever had, up until this point, was considered the best shower of my life as long as it met the criteria: the proper temperature and the proper amount of time.  Simple, right?  It doesn't take a lot to have an amazing shower.  So, what about this shower that I had today made it so special that I have to blog about it?  Picture this: 3 shower heads coming out of the wall, plus a detachable massaging shower head and a rain fall shower head from above.  Also, there was a water temperature control gage.  One by one, I began to turn knobs in the shower, and one by one something started to spray the perfect temperature of water.  I knew even before I got in there that I was making a huge mistake.  And as I stood there, not wondering if I had gotten all of the shampoo out of my hair or all of the soap off my body, because with water hitting you from every angel, you don't have to worry about those things, I started to think of every shower I had had in the past and how they just didn't compare.

Sadly, I turned off the water and then spent another 5 minutes just standing in there, wrapped in my towel.  Oh, I think that I failed to mention that this shower also doubles as a steam room.  It has the tile bench that you could sit on and steam, if you wanted to.  I did not.  I thought that it would be best for me to not become delusional and start to pretend that I could afford luxury items like this.  One day.  One day I will have an amazing shower like that, and then every shower will once again be the best shower ever.

Mixed Emotions

My last day of work was on August 20th.  Since then I have just been enjoying my free time.  I started off making great use of that time by working out everyday and doing some reading and writing, but lately I've found that I'm just laying around wasting away.  I told my dad yesterday that I feel like I'm just sitting around depending on other people for survival and I hate that!  I moved to Philly with nothing and I made it work, so why is this different?  I keep telling myself that I should stop complaining and be grateful that I have family who is able and willing to help me.  But I need more than that.  I guess I'm just worried that if things don't happen for me soon, I will start to be a burden and then people will regret helping me.  I am kind of annoying.

While reading an acting book this morning I started to realize something; my friend BB and I are working on a screen play and one of the characters was really hard for me to develop because I had no way of connecting with her and her situation.  These past few days have really given me a sense of the struggle that is similar to what this character is dealing with.  Well, mine is less severe than her situation, but it's a start.

I will admit that as I go through trying times, I do my best to live in the moment and commit my feelings to memory because I have no way of knowing if I will need to summon it for a future role or for a character I'm writing.  The only thing about living in the moment is that you are forced to experience the pain.  Perhaps this system is flawed.  LOL.  Sigh.  This too shall pass.

Who Is It?

I've been staying with my aunt for the past few weeks, and since being here, I've learned more about Michael Jackson than anyone. My aunt is a fanatic; my cousins even call her obsessed. Well, yesterday we were on youtube watching all of Mike's old videos, and when we came to "Who is it", my aunt told me something I did not know. This song was written for us. Now, I remember hearing the song when I was in middle school and loving the beat and singing to it like someone had wronged me, but when I heard my aunt describe the true meaning, I felt ashamed. It's not very often that I am forced to feel total remorse for something that I've done. The last time I remember feeling this way was when I poured salt on a slug as a child. I just stood there crying and my dad asked me how I felt and what I learned from that. This was that same type of feeling.

Obviously I didn't know Michael Jackson, and obviously I never personally did anything to the man, but in some obscure way, I did. In some obscure way, we all did. I fed into the hype that he was bleaching his skin because he wanted to be white. While I never believed that he molested those kids, I did believe that he had psychological issues and many other things wrong with him. The man was human. He was flawed just like the rest of us. I listen to the lyrics of "Who is it" and I feel as though I failed as a Christian. My only job is to live like Jesus lived, and I'll tell you, Jesus would not have passed judgement on that man.

Read the lyrics, listen to the song. We loved him and left him and offered up no explanation.

http://www.elyrics.net/read/m/michael-jackson-lyrics/who-is-it-lyrics.html

The fear of insects is called "entomophobia". There is no specific fear of cockroaches.

But I don't have a fear of insects; I have a fear of roaches. A bug is just a bug, but a roach, a roach is offensive and will cause me to shake and consider moving.

I was with my cousin and his friend at a Taco Bell by USC on Friday. They were talking at the counter and I went and sat down at a table to make some phone calls. While I was sitting there talking, a guy across from me started talking about a roach and how gross it was. He started walking towards me and I looked at his face and followed his gaze to the floor. What I saw was so disturbing and imprinted in my brain that I couldn't close my eyes for several hours after without seeing it's horrible figure. Talk about being shook up! This roach was easily, EASILY, 3 inches long. Yeah, that's the length of my cell phone. Not only was he abnormally large, but he seemed like he was raised up on hydros. He seemed semi elevated off the ground. The man walked right over and stepped on him. Crunch. I promise you that had I eaten anything that day, I would have vomited it up immediately. IMMEDIATELY. I felt so ill. All I could think about was getting out of there and thanking God that I wasn't getting anything to eat.

We got back in the car and my cousin started to talk about how that roach looked as though it had evolved. I was just sitting in the back seat shaking. We dropped my cousin's friend off and he asked me if I was ready to get something to eat. I could have cried. I was still so shaken up. It was too much. Too much. Believe me when I say that I don't deal with tini tiny roaches and I definitely don't deal with genetically mutated roaches. I spent the next hour just being unhappy.

Addicted to Dexter

I know, I know. I was gone for a long time. You'll have to forgive me, but I wasn't feeling very motivated. I don't know what's been going on with me, but it seems as though I've hit a stagnant patch. Not only have I not been writing to you, but I haven't been writing in my journal or working on any of my movies. I just feel kinda blah right now. Like I'm just laying around and waiting to see what is going to happen as opposed to me actually getting out and trying to make something happen. Well in the midst of all my blah-ness, I discovered that my aunt has Showtime. Yeah, I don't know how I managed to miss that. Needless to say, once I discovered the hidden treasure, I immediately went to On Demand, and fuled my addiction.

When I left Philly, I had only seen through Season 2 and I was craving Season 3, but it wasn't out on DVD yet. So imagine my surprise when I realized that not only was it available, but it was available in the comfort of my own home and I didn't have to wait for the discs to arrive. And really, this is when bad things happen. I watched nothing else between Sunday afternoon and Monday, stopping only to eat, sleep and use the restroom. And then, as if God knew that I could use a pick me up, Season 4 was made available to me. What! So, I watched the first 3 episodes of Season 4, and now I sit here, sad, because I must wait until Sunday to see the next episode. That kind of sucks. I'm thinking of taking on a new series. The Tudors is a Showtime show...any thoughts?

Animals With Eating Disorders

I was eating lunch with my aunt the other day and she tossed a fry to a bird. Several birds swarmed around the fry, and my aunt tossed out a few more fries. I turned to her and said, "Auntie. You know good and well that you shouldn't feed those birds fries. We're not even supposed to be eating fried food!" I then proceeded to tell her about the obese squirrels that my friends and I had encountered while camping at the Grand Canyon.

There were signs every where that asked us politely to refrain from feeding the animals. We found a nice spot on our hiking trail to set up our picnic. No sooner than we sat down did two morbidly obese squirrels come scurrying/waddling up to us. Needless to say, we promptly ignored the pleas from the sign and started to feed the squirrels Cheetos. In hind sight, that may not have been the nicest thing to do.

In keeping with the theme of animals who should not be eating fattening foods, I have decided to attach this email I got yesterday. Please enjoy!

A seagull in Point pleasant Beach, NJ has developed the habit of stealing Doritos from a neighborhood convenience store. The seagull waits until the manager isn't looking, and then walks into the store and grabs a snack-size bag of cheese Doritos. Once outside, the bag gets ripped open and shared by other birds. The seagull's shoplifting started early this month when he first swooped into the store in Point Pleasant Beach, NJ, and helped himself to a bag of Doritos. Since then, he's become a regular. He always takes the same type of chips. The manager thinks it's great because people are coming to watch the feathered thief make the daily grab and run, and that's good for business, and especially since customers have begun paying for the seagull's stolen bags of Doritos because they think it's so funny. However, the manager did say, 'This is New Jersey , and if that seagull starts to grab a 6-pack of 'Bud' to go along with the Doritos, I may have to put a stop to it.'

A Common Occurance

Hello All! I found myself kidnapped again yesterday. My friend pointed out that this is something that seems to happen to me on a regular basis.

I had a job interview yesterday, so my aunt took me. Afterwards we went over to my cousin's new house to help him move. Helping him move turned into us spending the night and me being stranded without a computer. It wasn't all bad though. I was able to see more of LA and reinforce my blossoming love for this city. I saw some of the mansions of Beverly Hills and the view of city from Mulholland Drive. This place is so beautiful.

It always takes me a while to get over the "I made a mistake and never should have moved" phase. After yesterday, I can say that that phase has passed.

Uninvited Guest

I've never fully understood the person who gets in the shower and then turns on the water. I've always been the person who lets the water get warm, and then I adjust it so that it's perfect, and then I turn the tap to shower, and then I get in. Anything other than that is just wrong to me. No offense to those of you who opt for another way of showering. To each his own.

After getting the shower all set up, I stepped in and closed the curtain. I was standing there, enjoying the warmth, when something caught my eye. I looked over to see a daddy long leg climbing up the tile. My first instinct was to spray him with shower water and rinse him down the drain, but I quickly stopped myself. I made a vow to myself a long time ago to not kill insects that aren't harming me, with the exception of roaches and ants. Ants don't really do anything, but there are so many of them and they just happen to always be in the wrong place at the wrong time. Roaches, I just don't like. No explanation needed, as far as I'm concerned. And of course, I kill mosquitoes. They fall into the category of insects that are trying to harm me.

Moving right along. So, I was staring at this spider as he struggled to make his way up the wall and to the window. In spider distance, he had a long way to go. It was about 3 feet. There was a slit in the screen and I was really rooting for him. After a while ( 2 minutes) I started to get impatient. I was talking to the spider, letting him know that I thought he was a pervert, offering him words of encouragement, but nothing seemed to work. By this point, the condensation had made the wall so slipper that the poor spider kept sliding and being blown about. And sadly, the poor spider got blown to the bottom of the tub, where he was washed down the drain. Poor little guy. I was really rooting for him.

Ignorance Ain't Bliss

Well today I learned some information that left me confused, disgusted, infuriated and a multitude of other emotions. Have you ever heard of Zeitgeist? There is a movie and an addendum. Tomorrow I will watch about the Kennedy assassination.

The things that I saw in the addendum were shocking. I always knew the government was corrupt, but the things that you see! OMG. 911 was staged. How does that even happen?! I know that you're reading this and just thinking that I'm gullible or whatever; but when you watch the video, it makes sense. It just makes too much sense!

Both of the videos are 2 hours long. I know, I know. It is time consuming, but I promise you, you will not be disappointed. Often, I've wondered if ignorance was bliss...the answer to that is no. Hell no! Not when you live in a country where we are being played like puppets. Too many innocent people have died, and who's to say that you're not next. It's just crazy and I don't even know how to be articulate about it. Just check out the sites.

http://www.zeitgeistmovie.com/

http://conspiracyrealitytv.com/?s=kennedy+assination

View these and we'll discuss later. I'm sorry to burst your bubble. :(

The Hypothetical Debate

Sorry I left you for so long! I went to visit my Big Mommy (my dad's mom), and I didn't have internet access, so sadly, I could not blog. :(

On the three hour ride up there, I actually stayed awake, which I never do. I'm one of those people who just sits down and passes out, but I guess I was in the mood to stare out the window. As I sat there, staring out the window, lots of thoughts started to spin in my head. I was taken back to a conversation that I had with a few of my close friends. I was sitting with Gwyn, Bonnie and Ellis, and we were doing my favorite time passer: drinking in the park. Now I don't remember how we got started on this topic; perhaps it had to do with the solicitor who was raising money for something that I don't remember. I honestly don't remember. But anyway, we were discussing whether we would rather lose our sight or hearing.

I had a professor who asked us this question, and he said that losing sight cuts you off from objects, while losing sound cuts you off from people. We debated this, and I think that we finally decided that it was a horrible hypothetical situation and we no longer wanted to play the game.

While on my car ride, I saw mountains, hills, all different types of trees, animals, cars and a ton of other things that I take for granted. I couldn't imagine not being able to see anything again. I think about when I talk to my friends on the phone and how I want to get a sense of where they are so that I can visualize it. It would hard to never see the smiling faces of the people I love.

Then I started to think of the music I was listening to, and how music plays an important part in my life and helps me keep my sanity. I thought about how hearing a song that I haven't heard in a long time can turn the day around. And then I thought about the voices and the laughter of the people I love. How do you live without that? One of my favorite sounds in the world is my dad's laugh. He has the best laugh. One of my favorite sights in the world is my mom's face when I'm telling her an exciting story. She just takes the excitement to a whole other level.

I had these thoughts swirling in my head and then I thought about the quote "is it better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all." Is it? If someone has never experienced sight, then s/he doesn't necessarily know what s/he is missing. Obviously s/he knows that s/he is missing out, but how do you comprehend something that you've never experienced? Is that person's life worse than the person who had sight but then lost it? Is it like reading a book? When I read Lord of the Rings, I had the hobbits and Middle Earth pictured a certain way, but then I saw the movie and they were so different. If you've never seen a tree, then you just have an idea of what it is in your head, and it's not until you actually see it, that it comes together.

After spending a decent amount of time debating this in my head, I decided that it was bringing me down and I opted out of the conversation with myself. I prayed that I would spend the rest of my life with my vision and hearing. And then I decided to never again have hypothetical conversations with myself.

Alive, Well and Blogging!

And I'm back!

This morning, my mom and I left at 6:30 to reach the Greyhound station by 7 for my 8:00 bus. Yes, the ticket requested that I arrive an hour before my bus departed, and since I am a good customer, I followed instructions. So there we were (my mom and I), standing in a line with 3 couples ahead of me, and I felt confident that I would get a seat in the front. I decided to go to the restroom before boarding the bus. As I was fooling around with the dryer, I had a random thought, "What if they bus started boarding while I was in here?" I quickly dismissed that thought and proceeded out of the restroom. Well...I bet you can guess what happened! That's right; the bus started to board while I was in the restroom. As a result of this, I was seated in the middle of the bus, which turned out to be a blessing in disguise when the woman in the third row never stopped coughing! Way to contaminate all of us lady.

When I settled into my row, I took out my journal that my friend BB got me for Christmas. I had been saving this journal specifically for today. On the front of it, it says, "In the midst of our lives, we must find the magic that makes our souls soar." The first time I laid eyes on it, I knew that it would hold my memories of my journey to happiness. I wrote a bit about how I was feeling and how appropriate/cliche it was that I was taking a bus to Los Angeles with no money and huge expectations to become a star. I wonder how many other people have done that exact same thing.

The ride turned out to be pretty uneventful. It got kind of smelly towards the end of the ride, but it could have been worse; it could have been smelly the whole ride. The most entertaining moment was when the bus stopped at Barstow Station. This "rest stop" was in the middle of nowhere, but had a McDonald's, Panda Express, Popeye's, Quiznos, some random Mexican place and a burger place. I was in awe and a bit shocked or confused. I didn't think that it was anywhere I would have wanted to eat. Thank God I packed a lunch. I'm not gonna lie, I would have immediately been tempted to eat at Panda Express, and one thing I learned when I ate Chinese food in some random town in Oklahoma, is that you never eat Chinese food in some random town.

I can't wait to update you on my new life! I also can't wait until I can call it my new and exciting life! Yay!!!!

Til Next Time

Well hello there. Sorry that I abandoned you over the weekend. I have good news and bad news. The good news is that I’m here now; the bad news is that I don’t know when I’ll be blogging again. Tomorrow morning I get on a bus and head for Los Angeles. This has been my dream for so long, and I’m finally going! I’m not certain of my living situation and what I will/will not have access to. With that being said, I just want you to know that I will do my best to locate a computer and keep you updated on my progress. Bye for now.

I Disgust Myself

Technically I just failed my attempt to post on a daily basis. However, since I have not gone to bed yet, then it’s not really tomorrow, so I can still post for today. Make sense?

Allow me to elaborate on why I disgust myself. Today, the computer started to get slow again, and rather than sit here and wait it out, I decided to entertain myself with some light television. As we discussed the other day, tv has really gone down hill. Today I found myself watching 3 hours of VH1 The Fabulous Life Of…

I got sucked in because the first one was the Fabulous Life of The Red Carpet. Did you know that at all red carpet events, the guests get goody bags? Not just any goody bag though, they are full of thousands of dollars worth of stuff, and there are goody rooms, where the guests just walk in and “shop”. So yeah, I got sucked in because this was all new to me. So there I was, hardly able to contain my excitement for when I’m famous and next thing you know, another one was on. This one was not nearly as exciting. It was the Fabulous Life of Posh Pop Stars. Again, like watching Kourtney and Khloe, I just could not bring myself to turn away. Apparently Miley Cyrus is bringing in almost 200 million a year in Hannah Montana merchandise and other related sells. By this point I was feeling ill. I’ve realized that whenever I’m watching a reality show like that, there is a little voice of reason that keeps popping in and reminding me that I have more constructive things to do with my time. Despite this nagging little voice, I still always manage to let 3 hours sneak up on me and then I feel regret. It’s a lot like eating that second and then third hot dog. Really? I only need one hot dog, but sometimes I just want a second because they taste good, and inevitably, regret follows. Third hot dog, you say. Well, sometimes I make bad decisions. What?
By the time the third episode came on, I was ready to be done with it, but the topic was on something that sparked my attention: insane entourages. Are y’all ready for this? I need a Glam Squad! What!! Tell me why J-Lo rolls like 60 deep, and half of them are just to make sure she is always looking good. Do you really need that many people? I was thinking more along the lines of 4, like in Entourage. Realistically though, I think I need my 2 publicists, my chef, my stylist, my good vibe technician – oh, that reminds me, Mariah Carey has someone who collects kittens and places them in her dressing room! Out of control! I don’t need one of those on staff. I’ll be fine with like 10 people.

Back to 1996

I’ve always considered myself to be a fairly patient person. Of course, there are things that will cause me to become upset or irritable: slow drivers in front of me, not being able to leave when I want to go and children. Today I was reminded of something else that upsets me: a slow internet connection. I have been taken back in time to the year 1996, when I would plug the extra phone cord into the computer and run it all the way downstairs to the phone jack. I would then patiently sign on to AOL and listen to my computer dial up its connection. Those were some ground breaking times. Nothing about the slowness then bothered me, but it’s because I didn’t know any better. I have been exposed to faster and to regress like this is criminal! I would even say that my computer was faster then, than it has been all day today.

I am typing this blog in Word, because I don’t know if I will even be able to connect to the internet to post it today. When I woke up this morning and tried to check my email, it took me 15 minutes for gmail to load and for me to be able to sign in.

It’s the simple things that we take for granted. I don’t remember the last time that I had to sit and stare, patiently, while the computer loaded. If I did feel like the computer was taking a long time before, I now realize that I exaggerated it, because believe me, nothing, NOTHING, takes as long as this computer has taken today. I could have baked a cake or mowed a lawn in the amount of time I have wasted today just sitting and staring. Don’t forget about the amount of faith that I have invested in this computer and cable company. Every time I close a tab or open a tab, I think that that is the time that it will be better. I am wrong. It’s a little disheartening to think that I have so many internet activities planned for tomorrow and I don’t even want to attempt them because it may result in me turning into the Hulk. I’m a calm person. I like to be calm, I don’t like to put myself in stressful situations, but I’m feeling like I’m running out of options here.

Just Some Ramblings

My mom just walked in and said, “What are you doing, blogging again?” I said, “Yes.” She then said, “I hope you’re not making a bad habit out of it.” Wow. Way to be encouraging/supportive mom. It’s not a bad habit; it’s a conscious decision.

On the preview for the 11:00 news, the anchor said that taking a shower may not make us as fresh and clean as we think. I thought about this for a second, and you know what, it might not make us as clean as we think, but what is the alternative? That’s like saying that brushing your teeth may not make your teeth as clean as you think. I’m sure there are lots of things that don’t affect us in the manner that we think they should. All I’m saying is that I don’t care if I get out of the shower and I feel 100% clean but am only 16% or something like that. I smell clean, I look clean and I feel clean. If I decide that it is not worth my time to take a shower, then I’m just dirty, and no one wants that.

I really thought that I wasn’t going to talk about Kanye West, but after actually watching the VMAs and crying a little….Yeah, I said it. A couple of tears rolled down my cheek. Reading about Kanye taking the mic from Taylor Swift does not do the performance justice. I will describe it for you, which just means that you will be reading it again, and still not getting the full picture.

So sweet, little Taylor Swift was so shocked that she won the best female video category and was on stage beaming, when Kanye decided to join her. You could see the joy in her face when he walked up there. He turned to her and congratulated her, and she was smiling the biggest smile you had ever seen. He took the mic and told her that she would be able to talk when he finished. She was still smiling. He then turned and proceeded to tell everyone that Beyonce had the best video of the year. It was then that Taylor’s face fell. Beyonce was shaking her head and actually mouthed “Kanye. What are you doing?” When he finished, he turned to, a stunned, Taylor and handed her the mic. She just stood there, looking out at the audience and finally just said, “Thank you”, and walked away.

I was horrified for that poor girl! She went from being the happiest person you’d ever seen to just embarrassed and ashamed. It was at the end of the show that I cried. Beyonce ended up winning best video of the year. She said thank you to a few people and then called Taylor on stage so that she could have her moment that was taken from her. And that is when I cried. It was sweet! Maybe I just felt bad for her because I expect to win awards, and the idea that someone would take the mic from me and say that someone else deserved to win is petrifying. The crazy thing is that I don’t think Kanye realized what he was doing. He seemed to have no realization that it was disrespectful. That’s kinda sad. He has gone on to applogize several times: on his blog, on Leno, he even called Taylor to appologize. (CNN told me he called her.)

Biggest Loser started again. Best day ever!

Kourtney and Khloe Take Miami

While everyone else is blogging about Serena, Kanye or Patrick Swayze, I opted to blog about Kourtney and Khloe Kardashian. Apparently Los Angeles wasn’t enough for the Kardashian girls, they had to take Miami, hence the title of their new show, “Kourtney and Khloe take Miami”.

Last night I channel surfed through “300”, “Top Gun”, “House Hunters International” and “Blue Collar Comedy Tour”, and somehow managed to land on Kourtney and Khloe. Not only did I land on it, but I was stuck on it for 3 hours. I was so disgusted with myself, but I couldn't turn away. I even came back after commercial breaks! Watching this show was worse than watching a train wreck. I don’t know what it was about it; it was by far the worst television I’ve seen in years. Wait, I just lied to you. “Real Housewives” of anywhere is the worst television, but this takes a close second. We all know that reality tv is staged, but this was just obvious and in your face about it.

Everything I have to say is not all bad. I did learn a new word. Are you ready for this? Slore. That’s right; the word of the day is slore. Based on the sentence contents, I’m gonna guess that a slore is a cross between a slut and a whore thus equaling a slore. Amusing isn’t it?! And you thought that you couldn’t learn things on trashy tv. LOL.

I did start to feel a little bad for Khloe when she had her heart to heart with the camera. She was requested to judge a Khloe look-a-like contest, but that catch is that the contestants are all transgendered. She didn’t want to judge because she has been so made fun of in the media for looking like a tranny. She eventually got over it. I do kind of feel bad for her. It can’t be easy being the big one in a family of petite girls, but then I think about how much money she has and how obnoxious she is and I move on.


Serena – Slap on the wrist. That was bad behavior and you know it.

Kanye – Really? Stop already!

Patrick Swayze – May you rest in peace.

croisSONIC BLT

After living Sonic-less for 4 years, I am making up for lost time.

I was sitting in my parent’s living room, watching tv, and I saw the commercial for the croisSONIC BLT and tots combo. Now in Philly, I would see a commercial and there was nothing that could be done about it. For the longest time, the closest Sonic was an hour and a half a way, but then they built one that was only about 45 minutes away from me. If I had a car, distance would not have been an issue, but as it turns out, I did not have a car and therefore I had no Sonic.

Imagine my excitement when I saw the commercial and realized that for the first time in years, I could actually be one of the people who got to try that amazing sandwich. My cousin came over and I asked if she wanted to go to Sonic. She said, “Yes.” I smiled.

We pulled up and I ordered it, and it was everything I wanted in a BLT on a croissant with a side of tator tots. The croissant was nice and buttery and the bacon was plentiful; the lettuce and tomato were also very nice. Overall, I give my croisSONIC BLT experience a 7.75. I will definitely get it again.

Abducted For A Day

When my mom approached me and asked if I wanted to volunteer at the food bank with her, my first thought was, “Yes!” But when I found out that we would be leaving the house at 8:30 am and staying until 1 pm, I was immediately turned off. Opportunities to do the right thing present themselves all of the time and more likely than not, sleep is the reason that I turn my back on these great opps. (I can’t help it, I really enjoy sleeping.) So I woke up this morning and decided that instead of sleeping in (like I do every day – I’m unemployed, remember), I was going to get up and go with my mom to help brighten some people’s days.

We got to the food bank a little before 9, and there was already a line. I’ll admit, I was a little frightened, but everything there went smoothly. Honestly, I wouldn’t mind doing it again. It was a great experience and everyone was extremely pleasant. Well, we did give them free food. I’m pretty nice when people give me food.

After volunteering, I was ready to go home and take a nap. It was 103 degrees today and just hot. Hotter than I ever remember it being and I’ve been around a lot of hot days. I was instantly, INSTANTLY, miserable, and to top things off, I was hungry and tired. Of course, this is when my mom tells me of her plan to go to the air force base to run errands. I was a little confused, because it was hot out, I was hungry and I wanted a nap; but instead, I found myself being taken on errands with my mom.

I can’t complain about all of it, because some of it I did to myself. For instance, I got in the car with this woman, I know her, I know that she is not to be trusted, I know that she is extremely left brain and sees the sense in consolidating trips out of the house and that since we were already half way to the base, it made sense to continue on the other half way, rather than bring me home. That may be some sort of run on sentence.

I did benefit a little from the trip out. We stopped by a used car lot and checked out some cars. It reminded me that I have no money and somehow plan to get a car. We checked out laptops. That also reminded me that I have no money and somehow need to get a laptop. We went to the grocery store and I sat on a bench and texted my friends about how miserable and hot I was. I also texted my mom every time I saw someone leave that came in after her. I also left out the part where I made the poor decision to eat Chinese food. I say that it was a poor decision because anyone who has ever been tired knows that it only makes it worse. After eating, I somehow managed to become the whiniest human being ever!

I felt bad for my mom. She had to put up with me complaining all the way home. When I got home, I immediately turned on two fans and plopped on the bed and began, what can only go down in history as, the best nap ever!

Attempted Murder?

I was reading a blog at (http://www.ijudgeblog.blogspot.com/) and I tried to respond and it wouldn’t let me. So, since I can’t post on that blog, then I will post on my blog.

I was sick a few years ago and I was at my uncle’s house in Texas. He decided that he would help ease my throat pains by creating a warm beverage for me. This beverage consisted of tea, lemon, water, a little sugar and a secret ingredient. I didn’t see this as a problem, because those are the normal things that any person would throw into a soothing drink, right?

So, he handed me the hot mug and immediately I smelled a familiar aroma. I know that you are thinking that there were a couple of familiar aromas: tea and lemon. You are wrong. I’ll admit that those are familiar smells, but what I smelled that day overpowered both of those and had no business being in a drink! There was a thick film that covered the top of the drink, and against my better judgment, I sipped it anyway. I nearly gagged as the thick substance made its way down my throat.

I turned to my uncle and said, “Is this Vicks Vapor Rub?”

I’m sure that you can all figure out his answer. Now, it may just be me, but I have always been under the impression that that product was for external use only. In fact, I’m pretty sure that it makes mention, on the bottle, that it should not be ingested and that you should seek medical attention if it gets in your eyes. I honestly think that my uncle had good intentions, but what happens when you accidentally poison your niece because you were trying to serve up a quick fixin’ home remedy?

Oh, no, No, NO!!!

Okay, so maybe this was my fault, but I really like to think that I was the victim in all of this.

Before I left Philly, I got a couple of voice mails from a collection agency, who neglected to leave any information, i.e.: what agency, the company who hired them, etc. So I called back a couple of times and each time I was on hold for at least 10 minutes (on daytime minutes), so I hung up. Well, when I got to Vegas, there was a letter waiting for me. Come to find out, PNC Bank, in Philly was trying to say that I owed them over $100 bucks. Oh no, no, no I don’t!

Let me tell you the story behind PNC. A while ago, like well over a year, I deposited cash at this bank in an attempt to pre-empt an overdraft. Instead, the cash, CASH, that I deposited took four days to clear and I ended up with an over draft charge. Now, I don’t have a lot of money, and I worked very hard to prevent this occurrence, so I called to dispute this. The manager that I spoke with was unkind, insensitive, obviously having a bad day and would not refund my money. Fine. Not a problem. I just transferred all of my money, except for $5, to my good bank in San Antonio. I left the account open in case I had a money emergency and needed a bank in Philly. But I never touched that account since that event, so for me to have a large fee with them really made my blood boil.

Following up on my collection notice, I called PNC and the guy tells me that I over drafted back in April 2009 on a $16 Philly Car Share charge.

Let me give you the background behind Philly Car Share. I signed up for this free program at least two years ago, and I decided that it wasn’t worth the money that they charge you when you actually rent a car; and I could get a cheaper car from a rental place. So, even though I signed up for this program, I never used it, and I should have canceled my membership, but again, I never used it, so it was off my radar. Off! Until they changed their policy and decided that they were no longer offering free memberships and everyone would have to pay a monthly fee. Apparently they sent me an email, but I’m not gonna lie to you. Clearly I didn’t read it and missed the part where they said they were going to charge me money for a service I wasn’t using. Perhaps if they had labeled the subject properly, I would have opened it. I’m assuming that it said something like, “Philly Car Share is Green.” I think we can all agree that that is not nearly as effective as, “We are now going to charge you for a service that you no longer use and as a result we will over draft a bank account that you no longer use, resulting in over $100 in late fees, unless you send us an email canceling your account.”

It’s the principle here. I feel taken advantage of. Sigh. Here I am, with no job, no home, no source of income and I still seem to be accruing debt. To make a long story short, I am in an all out battle with the collection agency.

People Harrassing My President

Well clearly I’ve been watching a lot of television! So, yesterday I was watching CNN and people were calling in to discuss how Obama was out of line and had “ulterior motives” with his inspirational speech. Now, I’m not going to pretend that I listened to his entire speech, but CNN did play me a snippet of it. What I heard sounded like a very inspirational stay in school message. Obama was speaking frankly with the kids. He told them that they need to stay in school, get a good education and make plans for their future. He also reminded them that Facebook is public and that anyone can see what is posted on their page, and that they should keep that in mind because that information could resurface one day.

Based on what I’ve described here, what seems suspicious? It just seems like good parenting to me! Obama just did what some parents haven’t been doing: PARENTING. Who gets offended because the president tells your child to work hard and stay in school? I saw an interview with one girl and she said that the president didn’t say enough. She wanted more elaboration on what he meant. What? What do you need him to expand on? Stay in school. Done and done. It’s hard times out there. There are people with PhDs who can’t find work. If you don’t have a high school diploma, how do you stand a chance?

I’m just confused. What is the world coming to when people will attack the president for offering the youth some guidance? Did I miss something?

VH1 Divas Live

I have been away from television for a while. Let’s just say that when the government, or whoever it was, says that tv is going digital and you have to get a special box and a special antenna, it would behoove you to not call their bluff.

So I was watching tv with my dad the other day, and a commercial about Paula Abdul hosting the VH1 Divas Live came on. “Ooooh, divas live,” I thought, until they listed them.

Adele
Kelly Clarkson
Jordin Sparks
Leona Lewis
Miley Cirus

Hmmm….Miley Cirus? Is Hannah Montana really a diva? Are any of them divas? Leona Lewis has that one good song, "I keep bleeding, I keep, keep bleeding. You cut me open." I do actually really enjoy that song. LOL. For those of you who think I’m being harsh on them, look at the divas from 1998.

Mariah Carey
Gloria Estefan
Shania Twain
Aretha Franklin
Celine Dion
Carole King

Now tell me something hasn’t been lost in translation. You don’t go from Aretha to Kelly Clarkson! The reason that VH1 puts on the concert is for the “Save the Music Foundation”. I think that we all agree that it is a very worthy cause, but it is more than obvious that their target audience has changed.

Unemployed and Living With the Parents

I watched “Failure to Launch” yesterday, and aside from the realization that I may or may not be in love with Bradley Cooper (hint: I am), I also realized that I now live at home. Granted, I am just stopping through on the road to fulfilling my dreams and eternal happiness, but in the meantime, I am not a catch. Imaging I met you and the conversation went:

You: Hi. What do you do?
Me: Aspiring actress.
You: Cool. Where do you live.
Me: Uhhh...I'm in between places?

In the movie, Matthew McConaughey lives at home with his parents, but has this great job selling boats and his two best friends also live at home with their parents. Well, I’m watching this movie yesterday and I was thinking that it’s not so bad crashing with the folks. Let me tell you about my day today:

Woke up at 7am, took the puppies for a jog (Bear and Shadow)
Got home at 8am, took a nap
Woke back up at 11am
Did pilates for 30 minutes
Ate scrambled eggs and blueberries
Sat in a recliner and watched tennis
Made baked beans and peach cobbler (to accompany the meat that my dad was grilling)
Ate more than any human should ever consume
Sat in the recliner and watched more tv
Talked on the phone
G-chatted and blogged

Yeah, I know that you guys are thinking that that sounds like any Saturday, Sunday or holiday. But here’s the thing, I’m gonna do it again tomorrow and the next day. And believe it or not, I’m actually getting a little stir crazy!

I’ve been unemployed before, and I discovered later that I was the worst possible version of myself. Man o man was I bad! I would sleep until 3pm and the only reason I got out of bed was to watch Ellen. I promised myself that I would use this time to be productive and work on self improvement, like exercise and writing. So far so good! I know I’ve only been in Vegas for a few days, but I think I can keep this up.

It seems as though I got off topic somewhere in this blog. To make a long story short: living at home is pretty nice! There is a ton of food (fruit and veggies even), two puppies, a super comfortable bed, cable television and, AND I don’t pay for anything. People have been asking me when I will actually move to Los Angeles, to which I respond, “I don’t know.” That is the truth. Things at my parent’s house are free! Seriously though, if you get along with your parents, you should consider moving back in and living as a minimalist. Done and done. I think that what I just did was reassure myself that I am not a loser for living like this and one day I will meet a guy who will also not think I am a loser for living like this.....but will that make him a loser? Perhaps we discuss that later.

Lollygagging

We’ll just call this an intro to my blog. I’m not going to claim to be a phenomenal writer or anything; I’m actually doing this as part of my means to celebrity. It will also serve as some sort of journal as I go on auditions and try to break into the acting business. What I will not do, is use this as a personal journal! I refuse, REFUSE, to be all sappy and depressed on here, unless it directly relates to me as an actress. I will also not use this as a venue to vent…okay, yes, I will, but I will do my best to have most of my blogs be upbeat, optimistic and sickly positive.

I’m calling this “Lollygagging” because I’m finally getting my butt in gear and getting out and pursuing my dream. I’ve wanted this since I was five. All I’m saying is, “It’s about time.” But hey, better late than never. Plus, 30 is the new 20, is it not?